Becoming ONE !

So there was SHE in blue dress with a white shade in between resonating Her shine. Her short stature did not shield the inner persona in any way but was in fact highlighting and reflecting it. Her steps were slow and short with an erect posture and body movement. Although I was seeing Her after four years but a mere glimpse brought back whatever remembrance I had of Her and the mind easily correlated and accepted it.
The occasion was preplanned and arranged. It was a get together of the two families at a hotel which was not far from my residence. After some time into conversation snacks were offered which played whatever role they could in breaking the ice between the two families. After some food and drinks the time came to have an individual one to one conversation with Her in the adjoining hall.
Saying a simple Hi was the most that could have been done at that moment. I seated, after offering Her the adjacent seat. It was not a date but it looked like one. The cool ambience that the hall provided with dim mercury lights and soothing music of a hindi film song made the moment more serene.
This time the mind was free from any judgments, beliefs and prejudices. It had no aim or target to achieve. It was in no hurry to have any conversation. Nor was it weighing any pros and cons it generally does before arriving at any decision.
But the conversation had to happen even if it was to be done for its own sake. The talk when started gave an ample reason to decipher the persona through the eyes. The eye contact was straight and sharp but discreet sometimes so that it did not fall in the category of stare. Her voice was very soft to the ears and the words spoken were evenly spaced and in fine balance..
Expressions through words have a limit and they cannot be solely relied upon. In fact it is the feel with the other person that is more important than to know about him as an individual. That feel can only come if it is equally reciprocated, if it is equally shared and if it leads to a feeling of belonging with the other. A feeling that comes automatically and without knowing and with which one becomes comfortable with.
An exchange of thoughts was now taking place and gained momentum with both of us playing their part even if it was just to keep the conversation going. One part of the mind was saying to let it continue; the other part was ready to blurt the approval made long ago. And then it came in no uncertain terms when I said – “From my side it is a Yes!”
It was accepted there and then with a smiling gesture.
The very next day I received a mail from my friend asking me when I was ending my bachelorhood and becoming Two from One!!
My reply was instant –“I have met my other Half yesterday and will soon be becoming ONE” :-)

Kuch Palan Di Saanjh (Punjabi poem)

Does like attract like? Do two similar things always add up to make more? Does it happen always? Don't we look for conformity when we easily adapt to situations and accept people who are more similar to us either in age, gender, religion, caste, country, culture or profession? How can we look beyond the stereotype when we form a relation, regardless of the other person's standing?

Attending an inter-religious marriage where there is no mingling of the two families but only formal compulsions cannot be said to be a good experience which I went through last week.

I remembered a punjabi poem I had read on Jasdeep's blog titled 'Kuch palan di saanjh' in which there is a hard acceptance of the truth of the reality imposed by the society. A society which still has strong roots in casteism. I thought of making it into some kind of music.

Below is the video of the song. To hear only the audio, click on the song in soundclick widget on the right.

Capturing it BIG

(Click to enlarge)

Its a new year once again according to the calendar and the winters are at their peak and no matter how much I avoid not being out during these days I somehow passed one of the longest night last week at a place that to me often brings a feeling of deja vu - RAILWAY STATION.

A place where people (and even animals) from different strata of the society (and even who are outside of what we call society) come together, see each other, think about each other and make views about each other according to their own mental make up and prejudices. One can view different sets of personalities, dressing sense and different habits and behaviours. Our subconscious mind is always analyzing the stuff constantly developing around us. If one's senses are active and working one cant help but retain his or her observations in the mind for future reference.
So I was there on a chilly night, the temperature falling to the season's lowest as I was told by somebody. The developing fog was clearly visible. The train was to arrive at 2220. Initially it was late by 1 hour. Then it was announced that it will be late by 3 hours. When you expect something and you also have a feeling of fear in you that it will be a one time opportunity (in my case boarding the train) what do u do?

STAY AWAKE. And that was what I was struggling to do. Cups of tea and coffee which we like to have during this kind of weather had by now lost their relevance. Feeling a little shivery I vowed to find out the brand of my inner vest once I reached home and never to buy that one again in my life. At around 3.30 the ting tong lady announced that the train is expected to arrive shortly.It was during this time that I heard some uproar some distance away. If the reason had been something else I would have gone there to actually know what was happening but this time I just moved my head in the direction from where I heard the noise and literally I stood still for a few seconds.
The first question that crossed my mind was Who is He? Certainly not a human being. But he had all the necessary functions to be called one. And Oh! He is walking too! How is he doing it? Long and large hands and legs. A large big face. Its really an extrordinary thing to watch a person as tall and large as He was in real life. How does He handle himself?. I started walking and went a little close to him. Wanting to capture the rare opportunity I took out my mobile and focused it on him. He showed an angry face when he saw me taking his picture. Realising that I immediately kept my mobile inside. The people nearby asked him some questions but they fell on a deaf ear as he sounded illiterate and did not respond much. Although I did thought of taking a snap with him but could not muster the courage to do so. By this time my sleepiness had gone and I heard the horn of the train.

If the train had been a bit early I would not have got the opportunity to watch and capture one of God's rare creation. The wait for the train now seemed worth. :)

In the picture above compare HIS height with the people standing nearby. But as they say Seeing is Believing.

Thanda - Thanda Cool Award

So I have received the butterfly award from Manpreet. It was she who introduced me to the world of blogging by commenting in her humourous style on one of my initial posts. At that time I didn't had any expectations from this blog. My idea was just to present some contradictions we find in our day to day life which I also tried to convey through the name I gave to my blog. But it didn't worked out that way as I found out later that its one thing to ponder and feel something and its another thing to let others know about it. I posted some of my thoughts but later removed them for want of exact phrases and the ideas I wanted to convey. Language posed a big problem.

During the same time I was learning guitar and thought of expressing myself through music. Till that time I was just a lover of listening to music. But the feeling I got by creating my own stuff was really great. I am still a novice and guitar is still just one of my hobbies I often indulge into but this blog provided me with an escape route to the other side of my personality. Moreover many of my colleagues don't even know that I play and in that sense this blog has been a huge source of encouragement from the other fellow bloggers.

And yes it does remain 'Thanda' for a considerable period between the posts - one more reason the judges found the award appropriate. :)

क्यों रोए मेरा दिल

क्यों रोए मेरा दिल
माने न जाने न
चारों ओर धुआं ही धुआं
समझूँ न करूँ मैं क्या ?

काली रात सोने न दे
तड़पे ये दिल मेरा
दिन भी अब काला दिखे
कब होगा सवेरा नया ?

Recorded this song when the siege of the hotels was still on following the terrorist attack in Mumbai on 26/11.
(Pic Courtesy - ibnlive।in.com)

O-HO !!

Recently I was asked to go on an offical tour to some nearby regions of Amritsar and Tarantaran of Punjab. As it was the first time I was visiting small towns of Punjab I was very anxious.I reached Amritsar by bus at around 11. Already late and no time to get to the hotel I placed my luggage in the cloak room and went to the local bus station to catch the bus to a small town Othian some 15-20 km away. The bus was already standing but it was almost empty. I was waiting for the bus to start so that I could climb on it.

It was then when I saw an old sikh man. He must be in his 70's. I immediately understood that he was a villager. He was wearing a white turban which was not neatly done and I thought that he must have hurriedly tied it. A second thought came that a neat one would have been out of place on his overall dress. He was wearing a wrinkled white kurta and pyjamas. He had a nice flowing white beard. Seeing me, he came to me and asked "Othian layi kedi bus jayegi ?"(Which bus will go to Othian?) "Ay ho bus jayegi menu v uthe hi jaana hai, aao" (This bus will go. I also have to go there, come.) I replied and climbed on the bus and he followed. He took the window seat and I got seated next to him. I could easily smell the odour one gets from village folk.

The bus started and I hoped to reach my destination soon. The driver put the cd of punjabi songs and the music started blaring. I gave up the idea of listening to music on my mobile which feels great when one is watching the green countryside. Cool wind was blowing outside I could see the flowing white beard of my companion from the corner of my eye. Why do we shy away from getting into physical contact with people who are not of our class or position or who are so different from us in many respects. I thought.

I positioned my elbow in such a way so that I could remain in contact with his body for a while. Inspite of having a small conversation earlier I had not seen his face completely. I turned my head and saw outside from the window so that I could see his face too. He had sparkling eyes which were a little moist. The moistness we often see when one is happy or sympathetic. The wrinkles were clearly visible and the curve below his eyes said that he smiled too often. I imagined him playing with little children and having a hearty laugh.

The ticket collector came and thinking that the ticket might not be costing more than a few bucks I asked him for two tickets to Othian. A hand grabbed my wrist. "Is tarah ni kareda bachhe"(One doesn't do like this my child) and he passed the money to the collector and took his own ticket. I saw him taking out the money from his pocket. He had one hundred note, a few ten rupee and few coins. He kept the ticket in his pocket looked at me, smiled, thought something and moved his head away and started looking outside. The destination was not far off.

The lady on the next seat ws inquiring about the daughter in law of the other lady whom she had met for the first time. How easily we forget the interactions we have with other people. What can we do to really turn an interaction into a pleasant experience? I will go my way and he will go his. I thought.

The bus now was bustling with village people and the music shifted itself into the background and was hardly audible. Seeing the name Othian on the shops outside I got up and told my neighbour that the destination has come. Both of us together with some other passengers got down.

He got perplexed after getting down as if something nasty had happened. He immediately went to a nearby shop and inquired if that place was Hothian. I was stunned and speechless. I on my part asked a person nearby if there was a place by the name Hothian. He told me that it was very far from there. "Tuanu hothian jana si ? "(You wanted to go to Hothian ?) I asked the old man in my crooked punjabi accent. "Haan"(Yes) he said. "O-HO !" I exclaimed.

"Ohi te! tu O suneya te mein Ho kahea !" (Yeah! you heard 'O' instead of 'Ho' !) . I saw a big smile with a grin on his face with twinkling eyes. But I felt ashamed and unforgivable. It was due to me that he was there at that stage. Later I gathered that I did heard Hothian when he inquired about it at the bus station but at that time I thought he didn't knew the exact name. But I was wrong. I was already late and didn't knew how to help him. May be the only solution for him was to catch the bus going the other way and spend some more money and time. I had no courage to give him money for the ticket. Nor I felt like saying him goodbye.

"Hune idronh hi vaapsi di bus aayegi tusi o le laina" (A bus will come back through same route take that one) is all that I said to him not thinking that he already knew it. I remembered him all day long and till my stay in Amritsar I was reminded of him whenever I went past the bus station. He might be somewhere now and probably I will forget him soon.

तुम हो एक हवा का झोंका

Sometime back I came across Balvinder's poetic blog where I saw a poem तुम हो एक हवा का झोंका This is apart from his regular blog Frankly Speaking and it focuses on the 'other' side of his personality. His emotional side I would say. At that time I didn't knew that someday I will be coming out with a melody. Although I did commented on it but I was not serious.This will be the second poem after Akhiyaan which I have composed for one of my blogger friend.

I felt so nice when I came to know that he has written it for his wife. I just imagined how his wife must have felt after hearing it. As he is living alone the tangs of loneliness are so self evident in the words used in the poem. The second reason was ofcourse the rhmying nature which made it easier to pick a rhythm out of it.

As for music I dont think I am even near to be called a composer, even casually. If it is then its just close to somebody humming a tune and making it into a melody. Anybody who hums can come out with a tune of her own. Its just that we don't try it as often as we should.Its a small and simple poem and no difficult words have been used but still it is expressive and I have let it remain that way. There's no much deviation in the pitch except in the bridge part where it was my idea to leave a silent gap to create an effect so that the feelings of the poet can come to the fore. The chords used are C maj, F bar and G bar.

The soundclick widget doesn't seem to be working. Click the link below and listen to the song in hi-fi mode.

Click here to listen

Poem :

तुम हो एक हवा का झोंका
आओ के ना आओ तुम
कब से आंखें तरस रही हैं
अब तो दरस दिखाओ तुम

बाग़ बगीचे खिल उठते हैं
आहट तेरी पाते ही
फ़िर खामोशी छा जाती है
बस तुम्हारे जाते ही

बहुत हो गयी अब जुदाई
काटा बहुत अकेलापन
अब तो तुम ऐसे आ जाओ
फिर ना वापस जाओ तुम

तुम हो एक हवा का झोंका
आओ के ना आओ तुम

Tag on 'Addictions'

So this time I was tagged by Balvinder. This tag is all about listing your addictions and most bloggers have retained them upto five. Tags not only help other people to know about us but during the process we also come to know about our own selves. Moreover to a person like me it provides a topic to write a post on. :)
Doing this tag was easy as I already know the five things I am addicted to which are listed below and I have placed them according to the degree of addiction.

1. Thinking - Well obviously that goes for each one of us including me. And yes I truly believe that its an addiction. We think day in and day out and we think when we are at home and when we are out. Infact it is our mind's best past time compulsion. Whether we 'know' it or not but the mind is always chattering even during our sleep otherwise dreams wouldn't have been there. Is this addiction harmful and should we avoid it? I have no answer. But I do feel that thinking doesn't have much place if one's inner 'Being' is resonating during our interactions with people and things.

2. Music - It is definitely the language of at least my soul. I listen to it when I am happy, I listen to it when I am sad and I listen to it when I am neither. I dont have any particular taste and try to listen to whatever that suits me for that moment. Be it rock, pop, film songs, ghazals, shabads, classical or instrumental. In near future I will like to listen to international songs in different languages. I generally avoid heavy metal stuff which totally blows away your ear. Nowdays I am experimenting by listening to various musical scores of war movies. Some I have liked like very much and whenever I listen to them it feels like I have been transposed to that era and place. Due to this addiction sometimes I really fear about my hearing ability and I pray to have good hearing capacity atleast till my end.

3. Guitar - Although I started learning guitar late in my life but now it has become my friend. I consider it as an extension of my love for music. Its my hobby and yes its my addiction too. Its rejuvenating and creative. Its like a companion whom you can turn to and it responds in kind. It plays with you when you play with it. It comes to life when you pick it up and strum and even otherwise when its sitting idle you can always take its willingness for granted.

4. Reading - Although nowdays I dont get time to read books but I really feel that there's so much more power to written words than pictures and images. As I haven't bought a television set due to this reason I am dependent on newspapers, magazines and ofcourse Internet which is a reservoir for my dose of current affairs and knowledge. The books I generally read are mostly non fiction but I really wish to get into reading mode sometime soon.

5. Driving - Contrary to popular perception that today's youth generally like to drive fast with one often finding motorbikes zipping fast till one regains composure, I like to drive my motorbike in slow moving traffic (ofcourse not in conditions when you are stuck in a jam). Seeing the beautiful trees going by, seeing various people's attitudes through their faces and many times overhearing their conversations, trying to manoeuvre your way through the traffic and then coming out of it unscathed really looks like an addiction to me. Infact on the way to my office there's a one and a half km stretch where it looks as if there's a sharp bend which infact is not the case as I found out sometime back. So people tend to avoid that area and always keep their vehicles in the middle of the road. I on the other hand always overtake them at the end of the stretch and smile on my self inflicted win. I really wish I could make them stop too to tell them that I have defeated them in the race. :)

Missing the target !

This is an incident I had a few years ago when I was in Kanpur. The winter had just started and I preferred keeping my windows open so that fresh air can make my sleep more enchanting. I generally am in the habit of covering whole body from head to toe if its chilling outside.So there was I, sleeping soundly. There comes a time in the morning when although we are sleeping we unconsciously know that the morning has come and its time to wake up. So it was during this time that something hit my face with a bang. The sound of it was too loud for me to understand what was it. Although living alone generally I dont fear moving into my empty house even when it is dark, but this time it was different. I just laid there. The sheet was still covering my face but the hit was real nasty and I just couldn't comprehend what was it. Has the fan above me fallen down? No its so big, it cant be. Has one of the wings broken. No I can still feel the air of the fan. Two minutes gone then five minutes. I was really worried. Or is it my windows are open and may be some bird has accidentally got inside and got hit with the fan and now it lays their. oh shit! is it some crow? sparrow. Oh my! these thoughts ran fast through my mind.Then finally I took courage and very fast I lifted my blanket to really see the thing. Fear and curiosity both were ruling inside my mind by then. What was it ? Where is it? I couldnt locate anything. I got up and then walked a little to the window.

There it was lying just behind the door. Well Oh! its the folded newspaper with a tight rubber band on top. Now I got more curious. To my amazement the windows had iron bars and something can get inside only if it is thrown almost straight from outside but my flat was on the second floor and the newspaper vendor always has to throw it from below. Only this time he missed the target which till then was always my balcony. :)

Now I was getting more curious. I then did my own research. In the end I came to the conclusion that there's only one way that it can really enter through the bars. All the permutation and combinations pointed out that only when the object (in this case folded newspaper) is approx 45 degrees titled and also takes one more turn when half of it is already inside the bars of the window that the object can enter. It was a highly improbable thing and I was able replicate the action only after doing some hard work by really working it out.

Since then till I stayed in Kanpur I never covered my face while sleeping or whenever I did I took care that the windows are closed. :)

Ankhiyaan -'Eyes' (Poem in Punjabi)

'Ankhiya' (Eyes) is a poem I stumbled upon on Manpreet's blog Kaaghaz de Kujh Purzei which lists her poems. Any poem's significance is dependent on the perception and mood of the person reading it. Moreover the reason why poets use a tough or deep language to describe even simple things in life is to tempt a person to look beyond the words and their meanings. And when one is caught in this temptation the words don't remain mere words but take the shape of constant stream of pictures in the mind.
Two things caught my mind when I read this poem, first the ease of the words which I understood unlike her other poems which demand knowledge of punjabi vocabulary. The second was the simple monotony which makes the poem go on and on into infinity. What I still fail to understand is why the thinking of eyes always remind us of a female character. I think this poem can be transposed on a male character too with ease!

The music is simple and monotonous. Being a beginner in guitar I have used simple chords G C and D. The trio works for most of simple songs although the strumming pattern can be varied as per the need.

Download

My third Composition (Kahin-Door)

According to me four things are essential to make up a good song. Tune which comes spontaneously out of your humming something. Lyrics which are added to something you already have in your mind. Music which is created with the use of an instrument, in my case Guitar and finally voice which gives it a human dimension. Only when all these four things work in tandom a good song is made.Will have to work out on all these areas more or less.

Download


This song is close to me as even I myself have made so many interpretations of what exactly I want to convey. :)

Lyrics of the song :

likhta hoon mein jo dil mein aaye

(I write what comes to my heart)

vo jo afsaana hai mera

(that which is my story)

keh doon mein man ki saari baatein

(I say all that is in my mind)

yeh bhi tarana hai mera

(this is also my song)

aisa mera hai kehna

(this is wat I have to say)

rukna na chalte rehna

(dont stop keep moving)

jaana to hai ab zaroor....

(have to go for sure....)

kahin door-kahin door

(somewhere far somewhere far)

jahan manzil ho raahon mein

(where the destination is on the way)

kahin door-kahin door

(somewhere far somewhere far)

jahan kudrat ho baahon mein

(where fate is in your hands)

chalta rehta hoon mein aise

(I walk as if)

koi na thikana hai mera

(there's no place for me)

kho jaaun leke apni yaadein

(I loose myself in my thoughts)

koi na sarhana hai mera

(theres no one to comfort me)

khojun mein khud ko jaise

(I try to find myself)

koi batlaye kaise?

(but how? someone tell me)

jaane ko mein hoon mazboor....

(I am compelled to go)

kahin door-kahin door

(somewhere far somewhere far)

jahan saaya ho raaton mein

(where there's shadow at nights)

kahin door-kahin door

(somewhere far somewhere far)

jahan khamoshi ho baaton mein

(where there's silence in the talk)

ye tha jo dil mein mere aaya

(this was what came to my mind)

yahi tha afsaana mera

(this was my tale)

keh di mene man ki saari baatein

(I have spoken all my thoughts)

yahi tha tarana mera

(this was my song)

Tere Bin (Rabbi) Cover Song

This song is originally composed and sung by Rabbi Shergill.It is said that originally this song was written for mother and it may be true too. Rabbi has a way with his lyrics and the real meaning of his songs is much deeper than we really think.
Ofcourse comments that can lead to improvement in my guitar and vocals will be highly appreciated.

Download

P.S : One such song is from his latest album Avengi ja nahi titled 'Ballo'. The complete explanation and meaning of this song is beautifully explained at docmitasha's blog.
The beauty of a song comes alive and enjoyment doubles when we really start feeling the song as it was the case with this song.

Hero (Acoustic Cover)

This song was originally sung by Enrique. Its a beautiful love song.

Download

Trick No. 9

Yesterday being in a fix over how to stir the sugar in my tea which our office tea boy often misses and not having a spoon nearby I did what I do mostly in these situations. Use my trick No.9 as I call it. I took out my 'Silai'(a long pure steel pointed nail with one end bended) which I always keep tucked in third buttonhole of my shirt, then looked right and then left and then stirred the tea to dissolve the sugar cubes. Only this time I was caught by one of my senior colleague and we both laughed out loud.
The utility of this simple device can't be undermined. Although the main function of 'Silai' is to tuck the leftover hair inside a Sikh's turban or patka (Sikh child's headgear) it has provided succour to me innumerable times. Not long ago one of our server room in our office which requires an access card to get inside somehow got forcefully shut and the bottom of the door came out. The access card gave away its use. Nobody to help me out and the work being of urgent nature, again I applied this trick. I placed my Silai near the door's knob and pushed it inside. Then just tilting the edge a little the door gave way and I was able to use my access card. Yo! it worked once again, I literally uttered to myself.
I call it trick 9 because the shape of 'Silai'is like number nine when its tip is pointed below.This trick not only works on tough and serious occasions but under normal circumstances also it comes handy. Be it opening of jam tins,tearing away the maggi packets or pulling out small things out of the places where your fingers cant reach, if used sensibly and intelligently it really works and saves a lot of time.
So much so that It has become one of my five kakaars (so to say ..hehehe.) after my Purse, Handkerchief, Pen and my Mobile which I always keep with myself whenever I go out of my house. Not to speak of the situations when out of nowhere you suddenly feel an itch somewhere on your back and you know your fingers cant reach that place, atleast I know I am well equipped with a solution and that is to follow my trick 9. One likely place where i have never used it is to poke somebody with it but a peace loving person as I am may be the need hasn't arrived till now. :)
I salute My Silai through this post (a deserved one)!

Aksar (Cover Version)

I like the song 'Aksar' which was sung by a noted singer Shaan. Here is my version of the same song.
Click on the play button to listen to the song or click on the link below it to download.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6709179

My Second Composition

Below is my second composition titled "Jaana Meri Jaana". Click to play or use link below to download.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6669231

Lyrics -
jaana meri jaana
mere khwaabon mein
tu naa aana.

tu mere din aur raat mein
khamoshi aur baat mein
jaane jaana tu kahan
aa ke mujhe bataana

jaana meri jaana
mere khwaabon mein
tu naa aana -2

tu mere sangeet mein
mere labon ke geet mein
jaane jaana meri dhun mein
dhun mein tu samaana

jaana meri jaana
mere khwaabon mein
tu naa aana.

tu naa aana ...fade

Manpreet's tag

Manpreet tagged me on this with instructions to do it soon. So here are the answers :
I’m: my image of myself.

I think: that I think too much.

I know: that I know less.

I want: my wants to end.

I have: a reasonable good heart.

I wish: I was able to live life completely in the present cherishing each and every moment without thinking of past or future.

I hate: when I am misunderstood and when in the middle of my sleep it dawns on me that I have forgot to put milk in the refrigerator.

I miss: the love of ‘love’ of my life, my future wife.

I fear: death.

I feel: I should be more tactful while dealing with people.

I hear: my inner voice.

I smell: of the deodorant I am wearing.

I crave: to be with the nature and learning and playing guitar all the time.

I search: for my things when I loose them and that includes peace of mind.

I wonder: how humans came into being, if man made God or God made man and ‘when’ did time came into existence.

I regret: not learning music and guitar early in my life.

I love: being in love with myself.

I ache: to be on a joy ride again in a helicopter.
I care: not to hurt others.

I believe: that beliefs are a part of individual conditioning and everybody has one.

I dance: whenever I feel like when I am alone, in marriages or with like minded friends.

I sing: whenever I feel like, sometimes all day long and mostly within myself.

I cry: when I feel or imagine the happening of true love.

I fight: only when I am hard pressed for it.

I write: when there’s no other choice of communicating.

I win: hearts of little children by being generous to them.

I lose: the track of the already visited location when in a new city.

I never: fail to compliment tasty dishes even if made by a person I don’t like.

I always: try to balance things, thoughts and ideas in my life. ( Libran trait)

I confuse: between various dal(cereals) names.(eg. Dal arhar, dal moong, dal masran)

I listen: to all kinds of music.

I can usually be found: doing work in my office or reading, learning or playing guitar and doing daily chores when at home.

I am scared: of loosing myself in the crowd.

I need: balance in my life.

I am happy about: giving meaning to my life through my own will.

'Mein Kho Jaoon' song gets a Booster

Got help from a keyboard player 'keoraf' who lives in Holland. He did the 'Mein kho jaun' song which was posted earlier on his keyboard and contributed to my song via net and did it beautifully. He has to his credit many karaoke versions of various songs. I then gave the song the vocals and the result is below. Novices like me feel indebted to people who take time and effort to give encouragement.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6646859

Lyrics -
mein kho jaaun
teri yaadon mein -2

tu hai basi
mere khyalon mein

mein kho jaaun
teri in yaadon mein-2

tum door kyon khadi
pass aao na
jaan ho meri
jaan jao na

tum bhi kuch kaho
hum bhi kuch kahen
baaton baaton mein
tum yaad aao na

hum bhi tum bhi
milenge kabhi

mein kho jaun
teri yaadon mein - 2

tum yaad mein meri
bas jao na
tum ruh mein meri
sama jao na

tum paas mein raho
door jao na
chahte meri
poori kar jao na

hum bhi tum bhi
milenge kahin

mein kho jaun
teri yaadon mein -2

tu hai basi
mere khyalon mein

mein kho jaun
teri yaadon mein -2

No television

I have come to the feeling about television the way I do about hamburgers: I eat a lot of hamburgers and I don't remember a single one of them. -John Barrow

If you are reading this post probably theres a high probability that you own a television and watch it daily, not the case with the writer of this blog. Not to point out or say that its a big thing to do but I think 25 yrs was a sufficient time for me to understand the reality of wasting my time seeing the illusions (blended with reality) through a television set. No doubt I still revel and cherish the memories of my favourite programmes I used to watch during my teens when there was only one channel 'Doordarshan' which did not give us much choice as the programmes were so few in number yet I don't think it was late when reality struck on me and I decided not to purchase television when I started living alone around 7 years back. Since then I haven't felt any strong desire to own a set. Any passing thought of owing one is followed by bouts of thoughts of the mess it will make (or I will make) if I bought one. In fact my living alone makes up a strong case for me to own one.Quite often it surprises people around me when I tell them that I don't own a t.v all the while expecting me to give my views on a particular program they have watched. As it happened twice today it compelled me to write this post.

I won't call it an idiot box as the term is often coined to it. In fact it has benefited the society in many ways. Little children and old people who may have denied access to the wonderful world of reading and activities due to their physical inabilities surely benefit. Professionals in the busy corporate world get a chance to have a look at the happenings around them during their short break through
television. But this is not the case with everyone. Its only that we people who have been brought up on the diet of television watching which has now become an integral part of our daily lives don't really know how the other side is as they haven't walked into it.All of us accept the fact that too much of everything is bad.But when it comes to implementing it in case of watching too much television we simply don't show the guts.

Next time just try to watch out the time you devote to surfing channels (which are at least a hundred in the city I live). This time excludes the time you actually devote to a program you find interesting (or not interesting) before u switch to the main channel you are watching.
No doubt the images get registered into our mind much fast than the written word but the written word provides us to think on different dimensions.The places and histories we can visit through our imagination through the written media provide us with an infinite field which the stuffy media fails to showcase us. Only then the essence of our imagination can be realised. The retention of data of voice and images from television in our mind is very less. Moreover in spite of there being so many channels the choice of what to beam solely rest on the channel producers for whom we are just one more product.

Yes I do understand that news and informative live programs (be it live news or sports) and science channels do hold an edge over other mediums of information yet I m sure and confirm that if one is not 'crazy' enough and if one just tries to identify and pick up some other sources and mediums he can really nullify the losses. Moreover what I have found out is that even the news that we watch only a small percentage is actually what we retain or want to retain.The same goes for science channels.Certainly I have to miss live events (in my case live cricket) but that price is worth paying for.

The real life offers more wonderful things for relaxation and adventure that can't be offered through the square box in our living room.In my case if I had television I don't think I would have found time to learn guitar which I think I have started a little late in my life.A morning or evening walk through the serene nature,an open mind to know the events around you, and a realization about the things that will make you happy in the real life will be more rewarding than the pleasure and knowledge offered to you by the television set. We can leave the television for others in our family who need. It is not necessary that we have to constrain ourselves from something that pleases us the most. We will find time to meet our loved ones and build our relationships. Not making TV an essential part of life will make us to experience the essentials of our life. Moreover with the passing of time we will come to understand that life without television is not a mishappening, but something closer to LIFE.

My first composition

So this is my first composed song titled 'Mein Kho jaun'. Although I had posted it on soundclick some days ago, I am posting its link here today after getting some sound advices from critics who no doubt are pretending to be soft on me. Devoid of any teacher or guide they definitely are a source of encouragement for me.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6555366